Sermons

Faith cometh by hearing and hearing by the word of God.
Sun, Aug 12, 2018

Principles of Biblical Parenting VI

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1 hr 8 mins 30 secs
There is a desperate need within every generation: the need for parents to counsel and guide their children in dating and marriage. The severe pain, trouble, and devastation that falls upon broken marriages and families cries out for the godly counsel and guidance of parents. From the Bible, we can learn that parents have a responsibility to help their children to set up homes of their own. In the passage we read this morning, we saw that when Isaac was forty years old, though he was quite capable of choosing his own wife (Gen. 25:20); yet Abraham sent his servant to Haran to seek a wife for Isaac (Gen. 24). What, then, are parents to do to help their children set up their own homes? In the first place, parents must realize that the goal of all the efforts they make in training and disciplining of their children is that they will be able to set up homes of their own in the fullness of time.
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There is a desperate need within every generation: the need for parents to counsel and guide their children in dating and marriage. The severe pain, trouble, and devastation that falls upon broken marriages and families cries out for the godly counsel and guidance of parents. From the Bible, we can learn that parents have a responsibility to help their children to set up homes of their own.

In the passage we read this morning, we saw that when Isaac was forty years old, though he was quite capable of choosing his own wife (Gen. 25:20); yet Abraham sent his servant to Haran to seek a wife for Isaac (Gen. 24). What, then, are parents to do to help their children set up their own homes? In the first place, parents must realize that the goal of all the efforts they make in training and disciplining of their children is that they will be able to set up homes of their own in the fullness of time.

This will require the parents to model for their children the kind of home and family life that is consistent with the will of God as revealed in the Bible. It is the responsibility of parents to bring up their children to be godly wives and husbands and godly mothers and fathers. In preparing them for their own homes and families, parents must teach their children, long before any prospective spouse comes into their lives, God’s will concerning the establishment of a home.

In seeking a wife for Isaac, there was one all important factor that Abraham wanted his servant to consider, that is, God's will is for a pure marriage and a pure line of believers within a family (Genesis 24:3-4). Secondly, children should be encouraged to make their studies and spiritual development their number one priority while in school or undergoing vocational training. Many start dating and indulging in illicit sex while in school to the detriment of their studies and opportunity for marriage later on (1 Cor. 3:16-17; 6:15-20; Gal. 6:6-8).

Even promises of marriage while you are in school or undergoing vocational training should be treated with caution. Whatever will distract your attention and prevent you from finishing your studies well should be avoided. Thirdly, parents should encourage their children to engage in economic activities through which they can fend for themselves before seeking to establish a home of their own.

No child should be encouraged to rely on his parents’ financial support for providing for his own family. The Bible warns against a hasty and imprudent marriage in Proverbs 24:27, where the young man is taught to cultivate his land before he has to bear the burdens of a family. Fourthly, parents should encourage their children to carry them along when they are entering into a serious relationship before proposing to someone or accepting a marriage proposal.

This is to offer the prayerful support and godly counsel that every young person needs at this crucial time of their lives (Prov. 15:22; 20:18; 24:3-6). Even if your child does not carry you along or formally introduce the prospective partner to you, it is your responsibility as a parent, when you observe the closeness between the two, to hold a conference with them in order to know what is going on. Fifthly, parents should encourage their children to carry the Church along by informing the Pastor about their intention to get married on a date that the families have agreed upon.

If that date is open in the Church Calendar for the hosting of the wedding, the Pastor will agree with the two persons planning to get married on a programme for pre-marital counselling. The wedding will take place only after the completion of the premarital counselling; therefore, enough time should be allowed for it in the overall plan being made by the prospective couple and their families.

 

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